Infallible arguments

MAMA: Max, it's time to take off your swimsuit and get in the bath.

 MAX: But Mama, I can't take it off -- it reminds me of Chicago!

Educational

MAX: it's movie day tomorrow. We have to bring in something educational. What about Lion King 2?

MAMA: that's not really educational.

MAX: yes it is; it's about love!

"I gotta tell you something!"

Lately my Facebook feed has been virally dominated (mostly among nonparents, funnily enough) by Samuel L. Jackson's reading of the new fake children's book, Go the ___ to Sleep. It's a funny book that does touch a nerve about the frustrations of "bedtime battles." It's really too profane to even link. But we've all been there. Here are some classic Max sleep-fighting quotes.


"Snails don't have arms. or feet. But they do have backs."
"Beetles are different from lightning bugs because lightning bugs have a light in their tails"
"I'm hungry."
"I'm thirsty."
"I miss Alex."
"Can you tell me the story about the tornado and the fire tornado?"
"I need to give [sleeping] L.I.A. a kiss and a hug."
"I'm making Teddy a new home."
"I made you a present."
[pries eyes open with fingers] "I can't close my eyes, I'm like a goldfish!"

I don't know Max. As a grown up, I have learned to appreciate the priceless gift of sleep. Maybe you will too one day. Your thought process is amazing though.

pictures coming soon!

conversations with L.I.A.

big boy, revisited

morning.

MAMA: to Daddy Should we send Max to the babysitter?

MAX: Not the babysitter, Mommy, I'm a big boy! I go to the big-boy-sitter!

Max on pineapple:

"It's delicious to me, thank you! It's sweet and sour and delicious."

"big boy"

Afternoon at the babysitter's house. Mrs. Paul has Max in her lap and pretends to feed him a bottle

MRS. PAUL: You're a baby!

MAX: No I'm not, I'm a big boy!

MRS. PAUL: Yes you are, you're a baby!

Max leaps up and performs a dizzying array of jumps, spins, and rolls.

MAX: Babies can't do that, big boys do that!

pictures to come soon, promise.

playing favorites

Morning, at home. Max wakes up in his bedroom and hears L.I.A. talking to Mama in the living room

L.I.A.: ahhhh ehhhhuhhehhhhaaah ppppbbbbttt ahhhh

from his bedroom

MAX: Good morning L.I.A.! I hear you, I'm coming... Hi L.I.A.!

MAMA: Good morning, Max!

Max walks in and gives Mama the side-eye

MAX: I was talking to L.I.A.

conversations with L.I.A.

"I'm dancing, Li-Li!"

Conversations with Max and L.I.A.

the backseat, past L.I.A.'s lunchtime

L.I.A.: WAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!

MAX: It's okay, L.I.A., it's okay

L.I.A.: WAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!

MAX: I know, sweetheart, I know...

boyz night wrap up

Max's house, the morning after.

MAMA: So, what did you do last night?
MAX: I partied with Papa!

introductions

Evening. A playdate, somewhere in Nashville.

DADDY: What's your name, little man?

MAX'S NEW FRIEND: My name is Cornelius.

MAX: Yo Cornelius! My name is MAX.

tantrums for advanced toddlers

Max's bedroom, bedtime. Max is fighting sleep, weeping and wailing in full tantrum mode.

MAX: Max is crying!

full sentences

Max's command of the English language is pretty impressive. Why, just yesterday, after he dropped my cell phone into his full glass of juice, he smiled that amazing Max smile and told me, "I broke it!"

upload bonanza tonight, check back in the a.m. for pics.

political dispatch

Max's new word: Ooooooooooooooo-DAMA!

I'll see if I can get the hologram to work.

grandpa-gram/ 1st sentence?!!!

Dispatch from Big Max:

"On thursday october 30 I went to pick up Maxi from the baby sitter. As I was carrying him down the steps, the boy told me as clearly as day 'I want to walk' while pointing to the steps. I put him down. Not grand pa hearing things."

boy genius.

Conversations with Max

Make video montages at www.OneTrueMedia.com